And The Number Is...

Last Tuesday, I was out to lunch with my mom and brother.  The thought that there was no way I could be pregnant consumed me.  I was a day late, but the lack of symptoms (the ones that I've grown very accustomed to over the years) weren't there.  Or maybe, it was just that I did a decent job at not letting the two week wait take over my mind and heart this time.  I sat and shoveled my food as my stomach turned, knowing that when I got home, I would test. 

Between the two and a half glasses of iced tea and the fact that I held my pee for a good 5 hours, I couldn't wait a second more once I ran in the door.  I unwrapped the test with my teeth.  Shimmied my jeans down fast as lightening and did my business.  My heart was racing, but more in an angry, anxious, "I don't wanna see that one line and know it's gonna ruin the rest of my day" kinda way.

I skipped my usual routine of placing a tissue over the the test for five minutes.

And I just went for it.  And watched as the pee made its way through the "testing window."

My heart beat loud and fast when within seconds, the test line showed a dark pink line - even darker than the control line.  Within not even twenty more seconds, the test line was almost red.  I nearly fell to the floor.  I couldn't believe it.  I was shaking and trembling and in complete shock.

Out of all of my pregnancies in the past, this by far, was the most beautiful line I had ever seen.

It's been a week, and I feel good.  I feel more positive than negative.  I feel symptoms.  And I don't know if it's that it may just all be in my head - but I am tired.  Sometimes, exhausted.  Sometimes, full of intense energy.  And very hungry.


 I actually got excited on Saturday when my boobs felt like heavy bags of sand.  Steve cracks up when I sit up every morning and feel myself up before getting out of bed.  With my progesterone being super duper high and taking 400 mg. a day extra of the hormone - I have a feeling it is kicking my butt.  But, I will take it.
  I will take it all.


It feels more real each day.


I can't thank you all enough.  Not just for your kindness after my last post, but  for your always amazing words, unconditional love, and sweet support through all of this. It is so touching and truly is such a wonderful blessing. 
 THANK YOU! THANK YOU! <3


And yesterday, it felt even more official.
At five weeks exactly, we went in for our first ultrasound.
Just like my intuition proved me wrong last week,
so did my intuition as to how many minions were growing in there.

And the number is....

*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*

ONE!!!

(one sweet little gestational sac)

And we couldn't ask for more.

I was surprised, but there was a feeling that washed over me right before the nurse began the ultrasound.  I thought, "Maybe it is one.  One strong little one who's gonna be a fighter."

Steve held my hand, as we kept giving each other little squeezes as the nurse told us everything looked great and just as it should. 

Our doctor left us with the words "Keep the dream alive!"  We laughed, smirked, and smiled

as we all looked at each other like "This better be it, dammit!"

  He has a feeling that with my progesterone and hcg being "through the roof" -

 it's a wonderful sign of good things to come.

 As it all helps the baby thrive.

And that's just what I'll keep on doing...thriving, hoping, and praying for the best.

And giving thanks for the blessing I am carrying.

We go back next Monday for our six week ultrasound.  And there's a chance we may be able to see the heartbeat.

I came home from our appointment yesterday, changed into Steve's gym shorts and celebrated with a slice of pizza and an extra long nap.  And when I woke up, I took some bump shots. 

Yes, I know, I'm only five weeks.

But, trust me, after all these pregnancies, I think a bump pops quicker and quicker each time.

At first, I thought, "Maria, is this going overboard?!  You're so early."

And then I stopped and told myself, "Nope, it's not!"

"This is it!" 

And I'm gonna keep on believing that as much as I possibly can.

Thank you all for believing along with me. <3

I'll be back at the end of the week with a bajillion and twenty-seven memories from the past week.

Blessed Lovin',