Just To See You Smile

"Just To See You Smile" Tim McGraw

I just flipped our calendar. Don't tell Steve. We usually unveil the "kittens of the month" together.  But, with November in the air, it was time to turn the page.

The 2 fluffies, though adorable, looked so blue...I had to cheer em' up a bit.

Okay, they looked much sweeter beforehand. 

Speaking of cheering up...
THANK YOU.  For all your kind words...your encouragement...your understanding...on my last post. All the beautiful comments and emails truly brightened my days. Steve reads them too. And we are so touched by your amazing support. It's always so therapuetic for me to just sit, write, have a big, ugly cry and let it all out...type away...press publish, give life to my thoughts, and then, breathe...
breathe easier.
feel my mind clear more space.


The past few days have been refreshing.
I spent the day with my Mom on Thursday. We had a lot of catching up to do.
We sat and chatted over a few, frequently warmed up cups of pumpkin coffee.

After an afternoon of pumpkin coffee and pumpkin bagels with pumpkin cream cheese, I suggested a run.
It's been a while.
I finally feel like if I want to, I'm "okay" to go runnning for more than two weeks at a time. With this break, I want to do the things I love, without any questioning.
It felt good. Between the cool night air, the occasional raindrops, my music, and the company of my Mom...it was wonderful.
My legs were super sore in the days following. Good sore.
Kinda like how ending this chapter feels.

It hurts good.

Before I left that night, my Mom gave me a gift. There were tears in both our eyes before I even opened it. That's how we roll.  
We're big fans of letting the tears flow before we even know what we're crying about.

It was a beautiful bracelet. With 3 words I hold very dear to me.  Faith.  Hope.  Love.  I will wear it always.   

When I got home, I opened the card.  How cute and how true! It reminded me of my post from the summer, "It Won't Be Like This For Long"

And, it reminded me of how truly blessed I am.  To have my Mother.  And to have her love and support.

It's not easy to see your loved ones in pain.  It makes your heart ache.  But, all the same, it makes it swell with such love.  And, when I tell my Mom, "Please, don't cry", what I really mean is...thank you. 

Thank you for being there. 

Always.

***
Steve and I went pumpkin pickin' earlier in the week.

There were plenty of pumpkins...some VERY smashed and oddly shaped ones. 

He found "the one"

Mr getting his workout for the day, carrying our pumpkins back.

***
Friday, Kim and I started the night at our favorite place for ahi tuna and the spiciest "bang bang shrimp"...

We laughed that we ate in less than an hour but stayed for three. We both have pretty loud voices (okay, mine is VERY loud) and are certain, the table next to us was only hanging around so they could hear all our life stories and wacky inside jokes.

We planned a sleepover. Man, sleepovers are so much fun. They make you feel like a kid again. It was so relaxing. We stayed at our house, and Steve went down the street to theirs. Us girls watched LMN (some very odd, twisted, still very addicting movies), ate ice cream and chatted until dawn. The boys played what else, but video games, and surprisingly only stayed awake till 2.

Me in my "BW" moo moo. It's my Nani's. Isn't it awesome?! So comfortable. And totally stylish! I can't tell you what "bw" stands for. Ask Kim.

Muffin was all ready for a girl's night and some Ben n'Jerry's. Kim was sweet enough to share with her.

Twinkie felt left out and joined us.  He loved having an extra bed in the living room. Plus, he couldn't miss another minute of "The Perfect Teacher" (one of the super clever titles of the hilarious movies we chose)

That's Mr. Twinkie looking out at the snow, Saturday morning. Yes, SNOW! Snow in October...in Pennsylvania...insanely awesome. I love snow. It makes me giddy. But, I love fall. I'm not ready to see the leaves go just yet. Thankfully, a lot are still hanging around.

Crazy, huh?!

Saturday, Steve and I took a drive. We had dinner together at a cozy restaurant. We said, "Cheers" many times throughout the night. Cheers to a new chapter. Cheers to living life. Cheers to good food and drink.

Cheers to my brother, Nicholas...Rockin' his Elvis costume at his gig.

Thank you, Thank you very much...

Me and Nicholas

Elvis and Steve

Cheers to us.
And, Cheers to being spontaneous.

Me and Steve OR Steve and Me?!

Within an hour of the picture taken of my brother and I...I, with much help from our friends, convinced Steve we should be each other for Halloween.
When Matt (man/woman/scary-awesome gloved/bird man) Vanessa (Snooki) and Doug (Zach Galifianakis from "The Hangover") showed up all festive, ready for some Halloween fun, we had to join em'.

Steve and I quickly went home and changed. I went through his closet and found a pretty pink tie, smeared some brown liquid eyeliner all over my face and called myself, *Steve*
Steve hopped right into the top I was wearing. Clasped my necklace around his neck and even picked out some fancy earrings. HA! He got major points for this.

oh honey, you're simply stunning.

Doug and Vanessa

Bill Vanessa and I

So much happening in this picture. Matt wearing my lipstick.  Steve wearing my jewelry.  Good times.

so pretty.

Here's Nicholas and I on Saturday...

And here's us 24 years ago...

Love it.  This picture makes me :)

I never thought Steve would have proudly sported my clothes and jewelry, especially out in public.
I knew he did it, "just to see me smile"
And, I smiled big that night.


With the mattress still being in the living room, Steve and I decided, *Hey! why not have a sleepover too!?* We woke up Sunday to sunny skies and the sound of the snow melting.  Between the comfy mattress (much thanks, Jamie and Leslie), Muffin literally sleeping on my butt, and Krimpy and Twinkie keeping us company, we didn't want to get up. Steve said it felt like we were in a cabin. A cabin!? I love cabins.  And, I couldn't agree more.  Maybe that's why the mattress is still where it is...with the fluffinators lovin' every second of it.

Muffin and Krimpet...too cute.
We've been sleeping in our regular bed this week. But, we can't seem to move the mattress yet.  We're thinking one more sleepover before the week is through...just one more...promise.


***
Sunday, very last minute, my boss asked if I had any extra time to clean.  With already having a few offices done, I thought, might as well, I'm already out and I could use the quiet time.
Steve was having a football/cheesy poof infested/man-party at our house, and where I was happy he was having guy-time, I certainly wouldn't be able to think clearly between the screaming and shouting at the television.

So, I cleaned a lot.  I thought a lot.  I processed a lot. 
I came home happy...to a happy husband (Giants won).
Before we went to bed, Steve asked, "Did you have a good weekend, hunny?"
Yes.  Yes I did.

*

Happy Halloween. Love, Muffin

Halloween, we joined our friends next door for pizza and handing out candy to the trick-or-treaters.
There were Princesses, Nerds (lots of Nerds), lots of Spidermans, Pirates and a few kids who just carried a pillowcase and expected 10 Kit Kat bars for ringing the doorbell.
The funniest kid of the night was this little boy, maybe 8 years old or so...
He must of stood there for a good 3 minutes with a trail of other sugar hungry kids behind him.  He was so indecisive about which candy to choose.  He grumbled. He tapped his foot. He even put his finger to his lip and made the thinking gesture. 
I asked him which two it was between.  No answer.
My friend smiled and said to him, "It's tough making decisions sometimes, isn't it?"
He pondered some more.
And finally, decided on Orange Nerds and Banana Nerds.
Good choice, kid.

Stephanie and I

We laughed afterwards at his dilemma. And how cute it was...the amount of thought he put into something...something that seemed so trivial to us.

But, Stephanie is right. It is tough making decisions. Sometimes, it's the simplest of things that take the most time to figure out.

Sometimes we're faced with much greater decisions...
ones that require us to dig deep into our souls.
ones that take time to feel peace with.

And, with each passing day, Steve and I are feeling that peace...
Knowing, we made the right decision.

Thank you all, again.

I'll be back later this week.
Ready to pour some more out.

Wednesday Lovin'...Make Someone Smile Today :)