Silent Night

"Silent Night" - Sarah McLachlan

 

With a title like, "Silent Night"...
Let's see if I can keep this post nice n' quiet.  (Yea, right!  This is like 3 posts in one.  Grab some egg nog and a box of candy canes.) There's already plenty going on. I was up all night.  Digging through photos - both old and new.
Concentrating on those moments captured in my life. 
The 80 December images (yea, I'm a photoholic) in this post - I see so much in them. 
So much raw emotion.  It might not appear so, but when I look at my photos, I remember each day.  Each night.  My senses come alive.

One little, two little, three little fluffy heads givin' me the stare down.  It's all I needed to see.  I knew what they wanted.  Their expressions said, "Mama, get off your lazy a##, stop watching LMN, and fancy up that Christmas tree!!"

So, with the help of Muffin, Twinkie, and Krimpet...

(Okay, Muffin totally snuck in a lil' snooze in between all the decorating.)

And after many hours, sore hands (and paws), a few hundred reheated cups of coffee, a 40 minute vacuum session, 3 ultra cheesy Christmas movies, extra sentimental tears, and an infomercial including Chuck Norris...

Our tree was shining bright.

(More photos later)

*****

Muffin was eager to help from the moment Steve brought up the Christmas lights.  We even found an old "piece" of last year's tree in the bin.

Something you don't see often - Me making breakfast.

That french toast is straight from a box. 

I'd like to dedicate this song to my one and only, Jessica.  Jessica, if you're reading - notice this is a two for one - there's a YCHTT at the bottom!!

Muffin was mesmerized at Mr getting the outdoor lights ready.

Fake snow.  $1 a can.  I'm in.

Lighty McSteve

*****

We had dinner in the city with Jen and Sean - the newlywed bugs.  There was food.  Lots of it.  There was pasta.  Lots of it.  "May we have more bread please?" - was asked 3 times.  We toasted our red wine to memories made and new ones to come.

*****

We saw "The Nutracker."

Kelly and Kurt (Drosselmeyer) took the stage.  They were fantastic!  From the moment the curtains opened, my eyes were glued on stage.  And my camera, flash off, (theater's orders) made sure to catch some of the magic. (even if the photos came out super blurry)

From ballet...

*****

To freezing cold football.  I went to my first ever football game.  It was Giants against Redskins.  Giants lost.  Big time.  Adam and Kim were so thoughtful to invite us along.

Adam and Steve were bravin' the chilly temps much better than Kim and I.

I mean, I came prepared with my crazy cat lady blanket and everything.  Steve gave me his letterman jacket and asked me to go steady.  I even had 2 bras on.  No joke!  Still, I was super cold.  I was helping Kim warm up her hands.

Adam didn't seem to mind.

Uh yea, that would be Steve to the left and me to the right.  Adam had his double XL Carhartt overalls in the truck.  I totally wore them.

People were staring at me.  I don't know why.  This was taken right after Steve caught me taking a "sip" of my cup o' cheese.  Hey, it was warm.

Me and Kim.  Just chillin'.

"Are we smiling?  We can't feel our faces!"

***

Kelly and Kerry brought their sweet lil' munchkins over for a girl's lunch.  We made our own salads and munched on chips.  Chloe, especially.  We danced to festive tunes.  Muffin came down for some fun and enjoyed some treats, compliments of Addison.  Veronica enjoyed the lights and colors of our tree.  And it was a merry little afternoon.

Chloe, sweet n' stylin' as can be in her outfit from Jessica.

Superstar!

She's a walkin'.

She gets it from Mimi, I'm told.

Pretty Mama.  Pretty daughter.

Veronica Kerry and I

Lil' Mins getting the special *treat*ment.

She spots a good one.

I. LOVE. THIS.

*****

So, decorating...

It is very special to me.  This year, especially. 
The past two Christmases hold such significance - that I wanted and needed to really take my time.  And not rush into it.  Steve and I put the lights on the tree and it stayed like that for days.  It was nice and simple and bright.  My feelings expressed in my last post...

They poured out as each ornament was hung.  Steve knew how important it was for me to take that time and put all that love and bittersweet emotion into something good.

We decorated our tree in 2009, the first time I found out I was pregnant. 

Last year's, I decorated right before our fourth loss.  It was such therapy.

And this year...it was the same - the cure for my aching heart.

Steve went to bed.  I checked to make sure he was asleep and quickly got to work.  I stayed up through the night.  Listened to my music - kitties keeping me close company and watching my every move.  It was so peaceful.  And when Steve walked into the living room first thing that morning...

It felt like Christmas. 

I remember my Mom turning the house into a Winter Wonderland every single year.  I remember the rows of Christmas cards she'd tape to the door.  Our porcelain Christmas tree, with those little colorful peg-like lights I wasn't allowed to touch.  That tiny green house that sat on our television...the one with the window that I "accidentally" poked my finger through.  The 500 and one "brother and sister" ornaments.

Christmases weren't always easy when I was younger.  I remember the trying times back then. 

I learned a lot in my early years.

It's like I said to Steve the other night...

We've got to focus on the good and every single ounce of it.  Because the good always outweighs the bad.  I look back to when I was a little girl...

 And I wonder if my Mom and Dad realize - that I never noticed the sad times as much as the happy times.  When I remember the years past, my heart aches with much more good.

Because I knew...

I was loved.

And I'm forever grateful for all this love in my life.

***

I did it all for love.

I wish you...

MUCH HAPPINESS

INFINITE HOPE

MANY SMILES

TONS OF LOVE

JOY

AND MOST OF ALL...

Thank you.

You all know who you are.

You've brightened my days.

You've lighted my nights.

Merry Christmas.
Merry Every Day.

LOVE, BLESSINGS, FAITH AND HOPE...ALWAYS,